What’s it that you’ve always wanted to articulate? Cheesy words like love, lust, friendship, relationships? But there’s a place for taste though. And if you dig deeper you’ll end up with FOOD. Now, what if we could articulate that for you? Hi, we’re a bunch of Foodaholics, who’ve spent funs of time and tons of cash to indulge in one of the carnal pleasures that humans can’t resist – FOOD, just so that you don’t have to! Welcome to our world, where there’s nothing more motivating & intriguing than eating good food!
DISCLAIMER: If you’re one of those who consider the canteen food to be the best diets around or love eating some brown bread & green salad with some sugarless juice for every meal or think KFC/Mc D/Transit/Whatever has the menu to satisfy your appetite then we suggest you do not read further. And if you’re a PETA activist we deeply regret any inconvenience caused as we did not kill the animals or vegetables we ate!
Coming to who we are, well, we do have names and we aren’t some invisible critics spending our wet dreams on the internet. The Hoggers’ main protagonists are:
Fickle Fin – The guy who gets all the orders screwed up (the waiters just hate him)
Brewmaster Bryan – The guy who’d blend the high spirits (it’s never too late for a drink)
Beer Bob – The guy with a penchant for finding those spirits (never say beer again)
Sloppy Sam – The guy who’ll just have anything (2 menus and a black tea for him)
Paneer Pat – The duplicate veggie (the confused soul )
The Pseudo Sophisticated – Well, you really don't want to know (Err...err...you lost him there)
By now you’d be having an idea what we’re on for. You do the little job you're trained to do. Pull a lever. Push a button. You don't understand any of it, and then you just die. Life’s too busy for you to remember to have a good time. That’s where we come in. We want you to have that good time and eat that good food because there’s no point dying without a few scars. Yeah, we accept we’re food critics, but the whole point is we’re not going to go about it the way you’ve always seen or heard. We are definitely not going to indulge in technicalities like the amount of carbs or fat or protein of the food we eat. Just because that shit’s boring, period. Now where do you find strangers with such honesty?
So the next time you you’re taking someone out, you know where to go and whom to thank. FYI when we’re running the show we do invite guests and there might be a day when one of them is you. At the end of the day we’re just here for our elation and hope that in some way or day it translate in to yours. And remember, after eating, everything else in your life got the volume turned down. You could deal with anything!
P.S: Due to our geographical limitations & the fact that we’re living on borrowed money, we’ll be only reviewing restaurants in Bangalore.
No comments:
Post a Comment